My boyfriend has proposed, but he’s not conventionally attractive

### Relationship Dilemma: Attraction vs. Love

A reader writes to Dear Abby seeking advice on their year-long relationship with a man they are not physically attracted to. Despite the man professing his love and intentions for a lifelong commitment, the reader struggles with the fact that they do not find him physically appealing. The reader questions whether they should overlook this lack of attraction and focus on their feelings for him. Dear Abby advises against forcing feelings and suggests that both parties deserve someone who values inner qualities over physical appearance. Ultimately, Dear Abby recommends letting go of the relationship if the lack of physical attraction is a significant issue.

### Past Hurt Resurfaces in Current Relationship

Another reader shares a distressing experience with their spouse’s friend, Valerie, who previously exhibited rude and dismissive behavior towards them during a lunch meeting. Despite the reader’s discomfort and request for their spouse to disengage from Valerie, the friend has re-entered their lives through renewed contact with the spouse. The reader expresses concerns about the spouse’s refusal to acknowledge Valerie’s past rudeness and the current one-sided communication that excludes the reader. Feeling unacknowledged and threatened by Valerie’s presence, the reader questions the spouse’s loyalty and requests clarity on their intentions moving forward.

### Seeking Guidance on Navigating Interpersonal Relationships

In response to the reader’s dilemma, Dear Abby advises open communication with the spouse regarding their continued relationship with Valerie. The reader is encouraged to express their feelings of discomfort and insecurity, allowing for an honest discussion about boundaries and loyalty. By addressing the issue directly with the spouse and seeking clarity on their intentions with Valerie, the reader can gain insight into the dynamics of their relationship and make informed decisions about moving forward. Dear Abby’s guidance emphasizes the importance of honest communication and setting boundaries in navigating complex interpersonal relationships.

Original Story at nypost.com – 2024-03-24 08:00:00

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